Stanley’s blogworld

The last time I made an entry was in January - four months ago already. Almost half a year has flew pass, but not unnoticed though. Since then Nanjing weather has slipped out of the icy cold clutches of winter, gradually warmed during our short but lovely mild spring season, and we find it know hot and humid in the midst of  summer’s.

Many big events have occurred since then, many that I am also not aware of I am sure, but none as important to me as Eileen’s birth on 30 April. Yes, that’s right. Carrie gave birth to a beautiful little, almost 4kg big actually, baby girl in the afternoon at 5 o’clock on that particular Thursday afternoon. And what a big surprise it was at first when the nurse walked out of the delivery room with little Eileen in her arms and announced that Lui Lei gave birth to a baby girl.

Carrie had all but convinced me that she was expecting a boy. She in turn had been told by her friends that this was the case.  In the months leading up to Eileen’s birth we discussed our curiosity about what our baby is going to look like, what “he” is going to be like, whether “he” is going to be a naughty “boy” or not, but I kept on reminding Carrie that it might be a “she” and always referred to her, our Eileen, as “she” whenever Carrie talked about our baby as “he”.

My mom-in-law and I waited quietly outside the delivery room for what felt like not too long a while, but it probably was about an hour, before the nurse introduced Eileen to us. I think I will always remember her sad-looking little face, but she wasn’t crying - she had just experienced her birth and must have felt very traumatized about having been taken out of the comfortable environment of her mom’s womb .  I felt an immense urge to hold and protect her. We took her up to the 5th floor of the hospital to where Carrie’s room was. I was at the same time feeling surprised (about our little girl) and fatherly concern for our baby, but I was mostly over whelmed by the whole experience so that when the nurse spoke to me I had found it difficult to register what she was saying. And of course the first thing I did ask her, before anything else, was whether Carrie was OK and she assured me that she was. Of course the overriding thought in my mind was the one that  both my wife and our child were both healthy and well.

Eileen is one and a half months old this week-end. These past weeks she has been the source of many new joys in Carrie and my life. Not only is she very healthy, but she is an extremely well behaved baby. She hardly ever cries. On this account we have been very lucky indeed. In fact, instead of crying to be fed or when looking for our attention she has a way of calling with a sound that sounds like “hi”. She often calls us with a little “Hi, hi, hi…” as if to say “Hi, I am here, come and pick me up now”. She is also growing stronger everyday and she kicks around a lot more, likes to be held upright in ones arms and holds up her head to look around more (but of course she still needs someone to support her neck to avoid her head from bobbing all over the place).

Carrie takes her out regularly for swims at the local baby-pool place. She has been going there since the first week after she and her mom arrived home from hospital (about 6 days after birth). Her initial 8 minute swims have now increased to 15 minute swims now and she kicks around in the little pool a lot more.

My mom-in-law has been away for two weeks to sort out Eileen’s documents in Xuzhou. Eileen needed to be registered in her mom’s hometown on a separate identity document. Carrie’s mom arrived back today and she will be staying with us indefinitely. From the beginning my mom-in-law had been a great help in looking after Eileen and her experience has been of great help.  While she was away I was glad to spend more time with Carrie and Eileen alone but I think Carrie, especially, needs her mom to help her adjust painlessly to the trials of motherhood. In Chinese culture one of the grandmothers always seem to be very involved in the care taking of a new born child. This also takes some responsibility off my shoulders and for me the biggest test is getting used to the new household arrangements. It is all for the greater good, and for now at least, I have to keep on reminding myself of this fact.

Domestic issues has been the main influence of my personal environment these last couple of months and as with all things new it will require some adjustment. I will be looking for new ways to make myself comfortable with all the changes and hope to meet the challenges of fatherhood head-on.